THE GREAT JOSEPHINE HOOVER

JUDGE HOOVER / MAYA HOOVER ---

PERHAPS YOU CAN EXPLAIN WHAT HAPPENED LAST WEEK AT THE CHARLOTTE MUSEUM.

I STOOD BEFORE A BODY OF VERY WELL REGARDED CITIZENS OF MECKLENBURG COUNTY AND

GOOD PEOPLE FROM FAR BEYOND THE CONFINES OF THE STATE OF NORTH CAROLINA;

I ADMITTED TO THESE DECENT FOLKS THAT I WAS GUILTY OF:

MISFEASANCE

MALFEASANCE

NONFEASANCE

IN THE PERFORMANCE OF MY DUTIES, WHILE EMPLOYED BY THE PEOPLE OF

NORTH CAROLINA AS AN EDUCATOR AT CARMEL MIDDLE SCHOOL.

GUILT OVER MY CREATING AN UNJUST BURDEN FOR AN INNOCENT COLLEAGUE

DROVE ME TO CONFESS MY NEGLIGENCE AND I FULLY EXPECTED TO FACE, AT THE

VERY LEAST, A LOSS OF PENSION, IF NOT CRIMINAL CHARGES.

TO MY AMAZEMENT, THE AUDIENCE FOUND HUMOR IN THE LURID DETAILS OF MY CRIMINALITY:

** WHERE IS SOCIETY HEADED

** HAS THE MORAL COMPASS BECOME STUCK IN THE WRONG DIRECTION,

I EXPECTED TO CONFESS AND MAKE A HASTY DASH FOR THE PARKING LOT AND

BEAT THE PURSUING MOB TO MY CAR AND THE SAFETY OF SHAMROCK ROAD'S EXPRESS LANE.

INSTEAD, I WAS GREETED WITH LAUGHTER AND GENERAL APPROVAL OF MY

WAYWARD ACTIONS.

I HAVE TO BELIEVE THAT FOLKS JUST ASSUMED THAT MY FAULTS AND MISSTEPS

WERE OF NO CONSEQUENCE WHEN THEY COLLIDED WITH THE DYNAMIC

FORCE THAT IS EMBODIED IN THE TERM HOOVERIZATION.

MY ACTIONS COULD NO MORE DAMAGE THE HOOVER JUGGERNAUT

( Juggernaut is a term used to describe a literal or metaphorical force regarded as
UNSTOPPABLE.)

IN ITS PURSUIT OF ACADEMIC EXCELLENCE, THAN A SLINGSHOT COULD STOP A TANK.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^


CONGRATULATIONS TO A GREAT LADY ON A FABULOUS CAREER.


TAKE CARE - GAFF